The Malkavians are mad they say. The violence of being turned from humans into monsters has scarred them irreperably so that every one is hopelessly insane. Some Malkavians see their madness as a gift and are completely aware of it and it's uses. Most, however, are victims of their violent mood swings, homicidal urges or complete memory loss. They tend to dwell in a world between reality and fantasy, fiddling with the devil and exposing their naughty parts to God. They are the most feared and reviled of all vampires due to their unpredictable natures.

For you to be a Malkavian means that your entire reality probably resembles tea with Alice and you're the mad hatter...or possibly the door mouse. It's hard to keep your attention at best and it's hard to keep your victims blood off your nice clean trenchcoat at worst. It's not that mommy didn't hug you, it's not a chemical imbalance, you're just crazy. This doesn't mean, however that you can't mix your ridalin, prozac and antipsychotics. Actually you should cuz it gets pretty interesting....oh wait, you're undead. You see and remember what others ignore and have forgotten. You are truly enlightened, now give me back my "my little pony" you sick freak!

Your Score: 12", Holly, Dragon

You scored 57 wisdom, 27 bravery, 21 emotional, and 5 martyrdom!

Holly is a powerful protective wood that good for use against evil, but it also represents dreams and fertility. Your dragon's heartstring core makes your wand very effective in hexes.

Your Score: ellipsis

You scored 46% Sociability and 70% Sophistication!

Your life can be difficult because of your insecurities, but you should know that it isn't your fault. YOU didn't ask to be thrown in around thirty times per page in every bodice-ripper on the shelf! Those who overuse you can kiss your . . . you know. You need to learn to hold your head high and glory in your solitude. You really do have excellent, scholarly tastes. You must never forget that your friend, the period, will be there to support you at the end of every sentence where you truly belong, and, if what is left out is as important as what is said, why, then you are as vital as the alphabet!